Edinburg 2010

Edinburg Testimony

I just want to begin by praising God for being so faithful in this trip. He showed me the meaning of a God-instigated, God-led, and God-completed work that is not dependent on human will or plan.

I read Psalm 67, and my heart is devastated by God’s Word to me

May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face shine on us—

So that Your ways may be known on earth, your salvation among all nations.

May the peoples praise You, God; may all the peoples praise You.

May the nations be glad and sing for joy, for you rule the peoples with equity and guide the nations of the earth.

May the peoples praise You, God; may all the peoples praise You.

The land yields its harvest; God, our God, blesses us.

May God bless us still, so that all the ends of the earth will fear Him.

Oh, what a wondrous and awesome work God has done in my life in this missions trip! As we were planning and planning, I did my best to use what I saw as God’s blessings in my life-my knowledge of Hispanic culture and my language skills-to prepare our team for an international missions experience in Reynosa, MX. Yet, the Friday before we would leave, disaster struck in the form of a massacre in a small town outside Reynosa. This spate of violence was enough to close the U.S. Consulate General in Reynosa, and a travel warning issued for any U.S. citizens wanting to cross the border. Needless to say, this caused much consternation among our church missions board and, after a bit of deliberation, resulted in the cancellation of the missions trip. I was the first to know, having called Pastor Fred five minutes after the meeting had been adjourned. I didn’t quite know how I would break the news to Stephanie and Akhil, the two people who were scheduled to have another language/culture-learning session that afternoon, but I tried to convey the seriousness of the situation and the clear indication that it was not safe to travel into Reynosa. Pastor Fred called an emergency team leaders meeting that afternoon, and upon arriving (late), I came upon a somber room of people with heads bowed in prayer. We reflected on our emotions; I was still in shock, while many others felt deeply hurt, disappointed, and disillusioned by the second rejection. Even though Pastor Fred brought up the prospect of a next best alternative-the reiteration of “Explore Houston”: version 2010-I was adamantly opposed to a “local” service project. Beverly mentioned McAllen, and God prompted my spirit to excitedly and enthusiastically agree that we continue pursuing the avenue of a cross-cultural missions trip. We ended on a mixed note, on one hand excited about the possibility of serving in McAllen, while we still wrestled with the reality of another dream denied.

However, by Saturday 3 out of the 4 missions agencies had denied our request. A group of 17-20 was just too much for them to handle in terms of accommodations, and on such short notice none could do so. We had one last chance-the contact of a contact with whom we had no relationship, a Mr./Pastor Garcia who spoke only Spanish. Upon this news and with the urgent reminders God had placed upon me during the missions conference, I called a prayer meeting with the Reynosa team at Susan/Ann’s house.

I remember the veiled anger and frustration, tiredness and lack of enthusiasm that I saw on those faces that night. I remember the questions-is this required? Do we have to go? I don’t want this to drag on too late…can we start earlier to end earlier?

And I was discouraged. From the bottom of my heart I was exhausted, and my faith fragile. However, God gave me the strength to pray even with my speck of faith in His promise in 1 John 5:14-15

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us-whatever we ask-we know that we have what we asked of him.

I openly confessed that my faith was weak-that I didn’t think anything would happen. Alex was the only optimist, saying-“I know God will be glorified in this situation.” Honestly, I reacted with the thought that his naïveté as a young Christian was understandable but most likely unrealistic. At the conclusion of the prayer meeting, we left with a “one-chance-left (and that’s not very probable)” mentality, with a sense of hopelessness and resignation.

Yet God proved Himself faithful. He was gracious, He blessed us, and man, did His face shine upon us!

On Sunday morning, I called Pastor Garcia at 8:30 AM. I hurriedly explained our situation, emphasizing that we would do “cualquier cosa que quiera” (whatever they wanted) and would like any possible opportunity that they could (possibly) give us. What desperation, no? But his response was quick and decisive-I want you to come, but I need to talk with my congregation first. Let me call you at noon, OK?

I was stunned. I expected a “we understand that you’re excited, but unfortunately…” and instead got a yellow light, pending on green. Throughout the morning I struggled with my mounting excitement, and at around 12:36 PM I received a call from the Pastor. He said, “YES! We’d love to have you. When are you planning to come in? Also, what are you planning on doing?” You cannot imagine the reactions that our team had-in short, there was much rejoicing.

We had no knowledge of this church, no knowledge of who this person was-Pastor Garcia didn’t know who we were, and had no idea what we’d be doing upon our arrival. This was truly venturing into the darkness by faith in God alone. Looking back, I really commend Pastor Fred for his faith that this was God’s will for our team-he wasn’t fettered by the possibility that this may be some sort of gimmick, some sort of trap, or some coincidence. Instead, he stepped out in faith that this was God’s plan for us.

We didn’t even know the address of the church until the early hours of Wednesday morning, when we were slated to leave. As we went, we left with joyful hearts anticipating what was going to happen. In a brief telephone meeting with the Pastor on Monday morning, we had the idea that yes, we were going to have a VBS for the children on Wed, Thurs, Friday, with a Carnival on Saturday. Yes, we were going to have a youth program. And Yes, we were going to join them for prayer meeting in Wednesday night upon our arrival.

Once we got there, it was a nondescript, tan-painted metal-boarded building in the middle of a rather shabby neighborhood. It looked clean, but rather small. We waited in the “parking lot”-a patch of rocks and dirt-for about a half hour until Brother Julio pulled up. We exchanged greetings, and he let us into the church. Upon entering the building, I was floored. They had a state-of-the-art sound system all set up, electric guitar, acoustic guitar, full drum set, and projector. This was no little rural church mired in poverty! Or was it? It was just so confusing! The building was clean, concrete floors and whitewashed walls offset by fluorescent lighting all around and silk floral arrangements all around the church. In the back were three classrooms, brightly painted and well furnished with chairs and tables. Truly this was a strange sight in the middle of such an apparently impoverished neighborhood in a border town!

Our first glance of the pastor was rather impressive-a powerfully built man with a ready laugh, warm smile and sharp mind. Upon arrival, he welcomed us and offered to take Pastor Fred for a glimpse around the city. As his interpreter, I came along for the ride. During that car ride, Pastor Garcia shared his testimony and the mission statement of the church. They were firmly rooted in the idea that even though circumstances change, the Word of God has the power to change lives and should not be adulterated. However, while the message remains the same, the forms of worship can change! He said that “among the liberals I am conservative, whereas among conservatives I am liberal!” We got to hear a snippet of his testimony, of having come to Christ at age 16, starting to preach by 18, and having done ministry for 30 years in this church, which he lovingly described as his family. When we returned, I was thoroughly convinced that God was firmly in control of this church, and that His Word was being powerfully preached.

However, at the prayer meeting, there were very few people in attendance. I counted 6-7 families, with people filling only half the pews of the church. With such a small congregation, I was not sure about what the problem was-why were there so few in this church? What was wrong? However, as the service began, we saw worship, adoration, and powerful prayers being issued by the church for broken families and parent-child relationships. The sense of grief was palpable, especially among the mothers of the church, and tears flowed readily as the prayed for their families. After the service, Julio said that we were all staying at his house for the time we were there. I was apprehensively looking forward to squeezing together tightly on the floor of some living room, and the prospect of cold communal showers with a garden hose. Yet, how God let his face shine upon us! The house was a beautiful two-story palace, where hot water ran freely and we enjoyed a state-of-the-art kitchen, comfortable lodging, and awesome living space. It was truly a huge blessing from God, and affirmation every moment I was there of His great love for us! Griselda, Julio’s wife, later shared with me another powerful testimony-that she had been praying to God on Sunday morning, asking Him “Why did you give us such a big house? It’s such a hassle to clean and take care of it-Lord, please tell me why!” And God answered her that morning when Pastor Garcia asked, “Who will accommodate this group if they come?” Her hand was the first in the air.

What else can I say? The trip was a complete testament to God’s faithfulness! On Thursday we woke up to a delicious hot breakfast of tortillas and toast, with freshly picked oranges and grapefruit given to us generously by one of the brothers of the church. We then moved into a time of meditating on God’s word personally, specifically on Psalm 51. In my prayer group, Alex and Akhil discussed their thoughts and desire for brokenness, a sentiment that I deeply share for myself and for our fellowship as a whole. I was so encouraged by Alex’s desire to learn, his hunger and excitement for spiritual growth, and his wholehearted embrace of God and dependence on Him for his life. Akhil speaks as one who knows the scripture, who knows core theology, who acknowledges God-yet it amazes me that he can be so close to the truth and yet so far! My heart broke for him, and I continued to pray that God would meet him on this missions trip, that God would overwhelm his defenses and devastate his soul.

After an absolutely delicious lunch of chicken with salsa (tomato, garlic, onion, chipotle powder, jalapenos) and fragrant Mexican rice, we went to Calvary Commission where we listened to the steadfast faith of Madeleine and helped assemble shelves and sort donations. That night we were slated to have a full worship service for the adults (P. Fred preaching), a program for the youth, and of course VBS for the kids. Preparing worship was rather grueling for me, as it is not what God has given me as a spiritual gift and calling, and pastor Fred stayed behind to prepare a sermon for that night. That night, we had about the same number of families come. But that night was when God revealed the real purpose of why He sent us down to this church at this time. Pastor Fred spoke on the parable of the prodigal son, noting in his sermon the many families that struggled with their young adult children leaving the way of God, leaving Christianity to pursue their own lives apart from God. He mentioned Julio’s daughter who had recently left home, of others who had expressed concern about their sons and daughters, and finally of his own son who was currently not following Christ. His message centered on the dual truth that parents must bring up their children in the Bible, teaching them the Truth, but also personal responsibility that the children have for their own lives. Parents love their children and desire that they don’t get hurt, but that desire can become wrongfully expressed by parents trying to control their children. What he urged parents to do was to offer their children to the One who loves them more than they could ever love, and to pray powerfully for their children without trying to do whatever it takes to force their children back to the right way. During the message, every single member was weeping. The Holy Spirit worked so powerfully that even my difficulties in translation were overcome by the hand of God in that place. When Pastor Fred invited those who wanted to offer their children to God, every family stood up. Every family had at least one child who they wanted to commit to God’s hands, and offer them back to the Father who loves them so dearly.

That night, during our time of sharing they said to Pastor Fred: “We don’t know you, and we didn’t know why God wanted you here with us, but we still welcomed you. Now we know why You have been sent to us.”

God’s blessing was tremendous during that night, and He just continued blessing the rest of our time there. We grew in love for the people despite our language differences, celebrating Julio’s birthday and laying our hands in prayer over his family. We worshiped with them, Wayne, Jeff, Derek, and Stephanie leading multicultural worship services where we got a glimpse of heavenly adoration of the LORD. We met and ministered to the youth of that church by hanging out with them late into Friday night, listening to their incredible testimonies and encouraging them in their pursuit of God. Finally, we ended with a hugely successful and God-blessed Carnival for the kids and a contemporary version of a “love-feast”-where we literally had a feast of barbecued chicken, beef fajitas, ribs, frijoles charros, barbacoa, arroz con leche, pico de gallo, and baked potatoes. The main ingredient, however, as the head chef told us-was love. Lots and lots of love.

Leaving was the most difficult part, for even though we had spent only three days with them it had felt like an eternity! They had embraced us, and we embraced them in godly love and mutual joy. With our final moments together, the pastor shared with us these words: Young people, in your life the world will offer you many things. However, know this: true success is not money, fame, or power. True success is discovering the reason You were created, and to fulfill the will of Your Creator in serving others.

As we ended, this psalm speaks to how we left, singing the Urbana song “Sean a Ti” together-

May the peoples praise You, God; may all the peoples praise You.

Our time there truly showed us that

The land yields its harvest; God, our God, blesses us.

And I can say that the cry of my heart coming out of this experience is that

May God bless us still, so that all the ends of the earth will fear Him.

How great is our God

God is great.

How often I've said these words, often with a tinge of a spiritual high, a hint of thrill traveling down my spine. Hands in the air, face upturned, the full worship band harmonizing. Yet, do I really worship and give honor to the God who is the LORD of the universe? Do I truly see Him for the awesomeness that He embodies, the complete divinity of His being?

No.

No.

No.

I don't.

I don't see Him beyond my selfish view of my perceived future. I don't see Him beyond the jealousy at others. I don't see Him past the blinds of the next week, the next test, the next meeting.
I don't see Him as the awesome Creator-I don't see Him as GOD. To ponder-what is God? Have I allowed my view of God to a tiny, contained speck of His true glory?
I remember climbing a waterfall with Kenneth, Karen, and Sarah in Peru, and as we were shimmying up the rope (with no safeties) I marveled at the raw beauty and awesomeness of what we beheld. I remember climbing to the top of Waynapicchu and being arrested by the sea of mist and mountains as far as the eye could see. I remember the perfection of green and blue on the hill as we descended the valley to the thermal baths. I remember them not only because of the fuzzy feelings and warm memories; I remember them because they struck me with the awesomeness of God as Creator. On our climb up the waterfall, I remarked to Sarah, "How can people see things like this and NOT praise God? How can they say, 'what an interesting result of millennia of evolution'?"
And now, I have gradually been making God into this personal genie holding the keys to my future medical school. I've been praying, meditating, and listening-but with my eyes and ears trained on a singular goal, a wretched prize. With this, I have focused my eyes on a profession too often filled with oversized egos and overweening pride. How often have I heard the none-too-subtle arrogance with every interview from a prestigious school; how often have the polite questions about acceptances demanded answers with devouring eyes and wry smile.
Too often we try to hide our insecurities, or boast in the most surreptitious way.

In the process, I have forgotten the greatness of God.

By coming before Him with my heart set on this worthless goal, I have negated the fact that I live for God-not that God exists for me!

I was created for this awesome, mindblowing, eternal presence. I was created so that at His approach I would be like Job.

Job 42:3-6

Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
things too wonderful for me to know.

⁴ "You said, 'Listen now, and I will speak;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me.'

⁵ My ears had heard of you
but now my eyes have seen you.

⁶ Therefore I despise myself
and repent in dust and ashes."

I repent. I come before God again, broken, a man who lives not for his own glory, but for the glory of the one true God.

glory and joy

1 Thessalonians 1:19 For what is our hope, our joy, or the crown in which we will glory in the presence of our Lord Jesus when he comes? Is it not you?
20 Indeed you are our glory and joy.

What touches my heart is the sweet, intimate fellowship with my brothers and sisters here. now.
How beautiful it is! How wonderfully marvelous! The wholeness, the culmination of my lunches, dinners, outdoor talks at the Broch, powerful and intimate cell groups, post-cell group silliness and hilarity, devastating-yet-encouraging prayer, dear, dear disciples...

You are my glory and joy.

my cup overflows

Psalm 23
A psalm of David.
The LORD is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
He restores my soul.

How beautiful is God's word, how wondrously marvelous His provision! When I read this, for some reason it speaks straight to my soul. The LORD is my Shepherd...who else protects me from the voracious wolves that seek to devour me alive? Who else snatches me, torn and bleeding, from the maws of the lion? Who slays my greatest enemies-anxiety and pride-only to bring me to a place of ultimate peace and comfort? the LORD. I shall not (NEVER) be in want.
He restores my soul. He restores me. OH GOD! How beautiful is this image! I have thirsted and feel as if I were dry up to this point, broken and nonfunctional until tonight, when the Spirit of God entered me and showed me where my security was. As a freshman, I remember sharing in my small group that the only concept I have ever held firmly is: God is sovereign. I distinctly recall the surprise that passed over Josh's face. And then I (being the self-conscious freshman) immediately thought-did I say something wrong? Uh oh...
Yet these past three years have given me a new appreciation for that statement. God's sovereignty. When I was but an impressionable young soul, God had already blessed me with this immense and ponderous, sweet and glorious truth about Himself.
He guides me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for You are with me; Your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

Recently God's been distant from me-ever since coming back from Peru, I have felt a distinct emptiness. Part of that's due to sin, part of that is due to pride, part of that is from disappointment. Whatever it was (and is), I have been begging and pleading with God to end this dry spell, this lack of soul restoration that has kept me in a constant state of stress. Even in that valley, that pit whose sides were deeply etched with desperation and longing, God was with me. He comforted me so that I would not falter in my ministry, He was the reason I could still show others His power. Yet inside I felt this crushing burden, this distance from God. It's a funny feeling-you KNOW that God is here, but you don't really know it. My mind and soul know that he's there, but my agonizing body does not. I desire Him more than anything else, my soul cries out for comfort-yet when I finish my prayers or devotional time I fall back into my own problems.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil;
My cup overflows.
My enemies, though they taunt and torment me, finally are vanquished. utterly. God Himself prepares the victory feast in front of their leery eyes. He honors me in their presence, He shows His sovereignty in the most powerful way.
My cup overflows.
I felt that tonight. I felt God finally preparing that table before me, anointing me,
and my cup-my life, my spirit, my soul-all overflow with the peace and love of God.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

Post #2

I got a bit disgusted with blogging after recounting everything I´ve been ¨doing.¨ So instead of having a list of activities and experiences, I´ve vowed to stick to what´s meaningful to me.
So, four and a half weeks have passed since I´ve come to Perú. What used to be exciting and new has now dulled into a routine...but this new sense of normalcy comes with its own jilts of heartwrenching separations and heartwarming rewards. The clinic where I work in, el Centro de Salud en Independencia, has become a home for me. From the nurses Isabela, Rhut, and Miriam to the doctors Darwin, Luis, and...I forget her name...I´ve really been able to immerse myself in their world and become (basically) a staff member at the clinic. I´m now quite used to babies and toddlers, and (unfortunately) well-acquainted with the arcane and confusing system of medical records that the nurses have to maintain to report to the ministry of health. These are basically notebooks, regular notebooks, with about twenty columns that have to be drawn EVERY SINGLE TIME A PAGE IS TURNED. So many columns that it´s so, so easy to make a mistake and subsequently 1) lose data and 2) confuse all the rest of the columns because you´re lacking one or have an extra. However, my frustration has borne fruit-my mini-project is to create a database program to ENSURE that NO information is lost between the lines. I´ve really seen God´s hand in this, because one week ago my usual Spanish tutor Reiner (who is amazing and a huge comfort because we talk openly about spiritual things and he shares so much with me) had to go to Urubamba on urgent personal business, and I was switched to a Cuban named Alexis. While we were talking during the third lesson, I discovered that he was a specialist in Sistemas Informáticas!!!! Basically, he does databases for a living. So, we´ve been working together and I really, really hope that we can get something awesome out ASAP.
One thing I´ve learned though is that everything, really everything, is based on relationships. If I am faithful in seeing him as a person, in appreciating him as God´s child, in loving him as a follower of Christ-it automatically builds a very strong relationship simply because, in human terms, I am a very good friend. However, if I cultivate a relationship with the aim of using him as a tool and a means to an end, my deception will be shown for what it is, and I will completely alienate him.
Come to think of it, relationships are what have caused some of the heartwrenching moments on this trip. First, I praise God for the beauty and strength of Christian fellowship while here in Perú. From the very beginning, God encouraged me by having a first contact with John Marshall, who was my original roommate and a strong follower of Christ (it made us both happy when we were friends on Facebook to see ¨God¨ as the foremost of our interests). Then, I met Trey and Tram, two really awesome guys (incidentally also from Georgia) who were in the clinical internships and loved listening to sermons. Which we then did together with John at their house on Sunday evening. THEN, I meet Reiner, my Spanish tutor, who happens to have an amazing testimony about how Christ saved him from alcoholism and despair at the age of eighteen, and who is passionate about serving Him here in Perú. The blessings of God are even greater than I could ever have expected-I met Sarah, a married ex-teacher who has an amazing dream of opening import stores tied to refugee camps, where they could be taught to make crafts that could be sold to provide them the necessities and income that they desperately need who, incidentally, loves Jesus Christ and house churches. Kenneth and Karen, two Singaporeans government-bonded studying at Princeton, who love God as well and were invaluable supports to me (almost like my brother and sister here in Perú). I was able to go on wonderful excursions with Karen, Kenneth, and Sarah to Quillabamba-Santa Teresa-Aguas Termales and Machu Picchu-Aguas Calientes-Putu Cusi (latter minus Sarah). When Trey and Tram first left, that was the first jolt that made me realize-this sense of normalcy is quickly ending. When Kenneth and Karen left, THAT made me reflect the rest of the day on how much I had grown to care for them and draw support from their friendships. Now, as I look forward to the one and a half weeks left, I find myself withdrawing from Matt, my host brother, because I fear the imminent separation and do not want a more painful severance. It sounds cheesy, but I know that for me there is no greater hurt than parting from people that you´ve grown to love. Yet, at the same time, I am continually convicted of my need to love God first before loving people. Matthew 21:37-40
Jesus replied, ¨Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it, ´Love your neighbor as yourself.´All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.
I have committed the grievous error of loving people, my neighbors, more than the Lord my God-that´s the root of my destructive reaction of drawing away from people. If I loved God, then I would be satisfied and always have love to spare for others. However, my love for others and the consequences of focusing on that love amplifies the hurt of separation so much that I go the opposite direction: instead of cherishing the relationships I have now, I reject contact and distance myself. Sometimes, I become a syncophant, an echo of compliments and empty words; other times, I am proud, aloof, waiting for others to come to me. In any case, I am an empty shell, devoid of meaning and love because I lack a passion and love for God.

First post from Perú

Since I´m at an internet café and have to pay by the hour, and will be going to fellowship with some Christian friends in a few minutes, it´ll be a very brief update. I´ll wax poetic some other time.
The weather here is crazy. Hot, blazing sun during the day and bone-crackling cold during the night. They weren´t kidding about the layers, and neither were they about the need for long underwear in addition to the five layers of blankets.
This first week has been completely mindblowing. I have been adopted into a family, with a dad who´s a chef and restauranteur, a mother who´s incredibly humorous and caring, and a sister who likes to go to bars and discotecas. I have a brother who´s from Princeton, a rising junior studying economics and finance doing an amazing internship with microfinance institutions in rural Perú. I have learned so much about Peruvian cuisine, and can now claim to make a simply delicious Pisco sour.
Proworld has a very good support system, with several on-site staff members and a very good partnership with many locals in the area. I have met students from New Jersey to Georgia, and have thoroughly enjoyed getting to know them. I started clinic last Friday, and Peruvian doctors are simply amazing. They diagnose and prescribe in a matter of minutes, and have no qualms about asking anything and everything to give a diagnosis. Mixing humor with piercing questions, they are definitely future colleagues whose perception is to be respected.
So on to activities. I´ve played tourist around Cusco, which is a rather charming city that was the center of the Incan empire. Although many of the temples and holy places have been razed or replaced by Catholic churches, it still retains its shape as the head of a cougar, which represents the present world for Incans (condor represents the realm of the gods, and snake the life after death). The alleys are quite narrow, and at night the city is really beautiful. The hillsides are like a spray of twinkling stars, and there´s a white statue of Jesus Christ at the top of a mountain that at night looks like a floating cross. The square is beautiful, as the lesser light of the lamps magnify the architecture and grandeur of the cathedral and Jesuit church, and there are people everywhere on the streets. One thing that I´ve noticed about Cusco is that there are quite a few young lovers who are a) furtively meeting in corners in residential areas, b) quite public with their affection, or c) at different points of downtown seemingly attached to one another (amantes pegados). This experience of urban life has really given me a feel of humanity, all the vices, emotions, and realities that humans have. I have been to my first bar, my first discoteca, and learned salsa dancing. I promised my parents that my first drink will be with them on the 25th of July, my 21st birthday, so I have not touched alcohol in large quantities. The only tastes I have had is my dad´s pisco sour (he urged me to try a little so that I know what a correct one tastes like) and a tiny sip of cuscena beer (which was bitter and blegh). I´m actually quite glad I made this promise, because drinks are pretty pricey, and not worth it when you can have freshly squeezed juice for a fraction of the cost and you thoroughly enjoy everything without having to be drunk.
I´ve also toured the Incan ruin of Saqsayhuayman, the fortress of the Incans that forms the head of the cougar. It was where the Incans fled after the Spanish laid waste to Cusco, and there are enormous stones that archaeologists are still trying to understand how Incans managed to haul up the mountain. One thing that especially struck me was the massive size of the cornerstones, and gave me a new appreciation for the importance of the cornerstone for any structure!
I´ve been shopping with my dad, and have gotten some pretty good deals on really authentic stuff. I´m really glad to have a host family, which has given me a security that allows me to not be so afraid of the city and this new environment.
One final Peruvian phrase: lo bailado y lo comido nadie le va a quitar
what´s danced and eaten nobody will be able to take away.

home

Home.
Refuge for my weary soul. Or is it a trap?
I spent today milling about, waking up at ~11 AM to my cellphone going off. Then, devotions (yay!) brunch (scrambled omelette w/o cheese + freshly brewed soymilk)...and then the one thing that I swore I would not do: TV. From there, it was a slippery slope to obsessively reading manga online...and then basically staying in the house, wasting several hours of my young adult life.
It wasn't until after dinner that I got to doing one of my goals for the summer: serious reading for 1 hour+ to edify my mind and soul.
And then, I realized-
A day had passed.
I could count the number of things I did on ONE hand.
I had minimal human contact.
Worse yet, I had minimal God contact.
This reality shocked me out of the summer reverie, the brief honeymoon of going back to my home church and seeing all the parents (not children, mind you) with smiles and updates on what God has been doing in my life-along with advice on colleges.
These next few months will be a test, and perhaps the most grueling one of all: how to maintain spiritual growth and intimacy when I am wrenched away from my beloved fellowship in Houston.
Although I always considered DCFC my church home, it's often been a spiritual wasteland in terms of fellowship for young adults. HCC was not necessarily where I felt most comfortable, but the intimate and life-giving fellowship at Rice has provided me a testament to God's provision in my life. Now that I'm back for four months, it's time to see where God wants me in His kingdom here. I no longer have the excuses to hide from fellowship (aka MCAT), and neither do I have a mandate to start another fellowship here in Dallas (I'll be gone for 6 weeks in the middle). I just know that God wants me here for a reason. He wants me to plug into DCFC and use His blessings for everlasting glory. But how?!
God is faithful, but I am not always so. Yet even when I am faithless, God will continue to be faithful, for He cannot disown Himself. (2 Timothy 2:13)
Today God revealed to me the importance of clinging to Him...and revitalized the desire for me to test my intellectual boundaries in this faith! While reading a chapter from Beyond Opinion, a collection of essays compiled by Ravi Zacharias, I read this sentence that struck me in the stomach: "My prayer for weekly youth group gatherings is that they will go from being an entertainment show full of feel-good games to an intense forum that invites tough questions and provides satisfying answers." Wow. How is it that I have (personally) started to deviate from the mind and into emotion alone? How is it that relationships are taking undue precedence over the testing of our faith?
I know I'm in dangerous territory, because a corollary to the "intense forum" is that we must LIVE out these "intense" truths WITH LOVE so that God is glorified, not ourselves.
But I still ask of myself: do I go to the opposite extreme? Have I preached love to the extent that I have deviated into the realm of pleasing people and have not engaged in the hard-hitting evangelism that demands asking and answering these tough questions?
I think so.
Then God reminded me of what I had read in His word during the morning: 2 Peter 1:16-21
16We did not follow cleverly invented stories when we told you about the power and coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, but we were eyewitnesses of his majesty. 17For he received honor and glory from God the Father when the voice came to him from the Majestic Glory, saying, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased." 18We ourselves heard this voice that came from heaven when we were with him on the sacred mountain.

19And we have the word of the prophets made more certain, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts. 20Above all, you must understand that no prophecy of Scripture came about by the prophet's own interpretation. 21For prophecy never had its origin in the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.

Peter fights against the perception of "cleverly invented stories" by saying that he was an EYEWITNESS to the majesty of God! Furthermore, it is on the WORD of the prophets (aka Scripture) that provides the ultimate basis for Jesus Christ.
This sharp, pointed argument for the legitimacy of the Bible was what Peter and the first-century Christians had to engage in to both deflect criticism and engage the lost in dialogue about the one true Christ! What good are we if we affirm the love of Christ among ourselves, yet fall flat at any challenge and fidget uncomfortably when hard questions are asked?
Rather, let me strive (however hard it is) to test my mind on these questions with a heart that prays for guidance and a spirit obedient to God Almighty.

James 1:6 6But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.